16-year-old refuses to give his unemployed 53-year-old father $200 a month for gas money: 'If you weren’t this bad off before I got a job, why are you now?'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Writer and Editor
Apr 22, 2026 12:30 PM EDT

How shameless can you be? 

It's pretty common for teenagers to ask their parents for money, only to be told, "Get a job!" It's perfectly reasonable to expect a 16-year-old to work for their own pocket change in order to teach them the value of the dollar. 

It's much less common for that dynamic to be flipped, with a parent badgering their teenage child for money to cover basic necessities like food and transportation. Any parent who relies on their kid to make ends meet needs to take a long, hard look in the mirror and figure out exactly what they're doing wrong so they don't make their child the breadwinner. 

The dad in this story thinks he's doing his son a real favor by driving him to his fast-food job, but he's trying to take $200 a month out of his son's pocket rather than work for a living. He sounds like a real winner. 

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  • Man in blue t-shirt with glasses smiling
    via Frederick Shaw

    Middle-aged dad asks his teenage son for money, instead of going out and getting himself a job. 

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Am I the bad guy for not giving my father money and food from my job?

    CONTEXT: I (16M) just started my job not too long ago in November of last year. After looking for a job since I was 14, I finally landed one that my sister found for me. My
    via u/Candylayla-
  • first month or so, I took Lyfts and Ubers there until my father (53M) got terminated from his past job. After that, we came to the conclusion that as long as I pitch in most of the time for gas and whatnot, he would drive me to and
    via u/Candylayla-
  • from my workplace. Recently, he has been getting entitled and overly invested into my job mainly because it is a fast food chain, and I sometimes offer to bring food home. Shortly after,
    via u/Candylayla-
  • Two trays filled with hamburgers and french fries
    via María Sainz Cabezalí (Unsplash+)

    Leftover fast food burgers and fries that teenage employees can bring home to their families. 

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • this turned into him asking for more and more things revolving around my work life and my paychecks. Things like food, money to buy him gas (which he tells me to put $50 in every week, even though I get paid BIWEEKLY).
    via u/Candylayla-
  • I eventually stand my ground and tell him that I cannot and will not continue to provide for him as if he is my child. i went on to question him about it and why this is only happening now, when i secure a job. "If you
    via u/Candylayla-
  • weren't this bad off before I secured a job, why is this just now occurring?" My father doesn't say anything, then goes on to speak with my mother about a paper for disemployment proving
    via u/Candylayla-
  • that he is actively searching for a job. My mother then has a GREAT idea and recommends my dad walk into the building with me and wait until I get a paper copy of whatever it is he wants, which could realistically
    via u/Candylayla-
  • risk getting me terminated from my position as well. At this point, I am at my breaking point due to the fact that I am being treated like my workplace is something they can take advantage of as if I wouldn't get into conflict
    via u/Candylayla-
  • because of it. He then goes on a rant about how I never want to help him with anything, even though he drives me to and from work, blah blah.
    via u/Candylayla-
  • (EXTRA CONTEXT): My father voluntarily does DoorDash throughout the mornings and has recently reconstructed our home floors, which cost him over $1K. I'm not sure how he
    via u/Candylayla-
  • A man in a blue hardhat is working on constructing flooring
    via JSB Co. (Unsplash+)

    Dad works on installing new flooring, which will cost him a pretty penny.

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • suddenly has no money or food when it comes to asking me for things now. Am I the ah le even though i'm just trying to save money to get out of the same situation they were in at my age?
    via u/Candylayla-
  • Appropriate-Mall9781 NTA. He's taking advantage of your situation. You had a working deal, and he's using that to wiggle his way into getting more, no matter what it does to you.
    via u/Appropriate-Mall9781
  • Candylayla- OP Might i add that The more i give, if i eventually stop or say that i cannot do something for him, he threatens to stop giving me rides and says he will just neglect my needs "as i am doing the same for him???”
    via u/Candylayla-
  • Paevatar If he stops giving you rides to work, and you lose your job, how will he get money from you? Why doesn't he actually apply for a job at your workplace, and start working there?
    via u/Paevatar
  • If he neglects your needs, he should be reported to Child Protective Services. Parents are obligated to support their minor children, not force their children to support them. OP, you are NTA. I hope you can move out of there as soon as you turn 18. Is there a relative you could go to?
    via u/Paevatar
  • Appropriate-Mall9781 Can you involve your mother in this? Or someone else that he can't pull the 'you're my kid, so I don't have to negotiate' card with? Restate what the original deal was, and make sure he's clear that that's what the price of getting rides is, without him getting to add on more later. If he refuses, then he gets absolutely nothing.
    via u/Appropriate-Mall9781
  • Candylayla- OP whenever i try to bring anything up to my mother, she just replies with, "that's how he is it can't say anything to him or he would say the same to me," essentially saying "i'm not going to bother because i can't change him due to the fact that i don't want to try."
    via u/Candylayla-

  • It's true that she can't change him, but she needs to stop enabling his bad behavior, because it's hurting their son. She needs to sit down with him and tell him that the way he's treating their son is unacceptable, and he needs to find a more stable income immediately. It's easier said than done, but it needs to be done. 

  • Bandito21 Dema Can you carpool with a coworker, ride a bike, take the bus/train? Maybe carpool to the bus station. Then save up as much as you can and go to college or a trade school far away. I grew up with a parent that no one can talk to because he'll yell and fight. Good luck.
    via u/Bandito21Dema

  • Heck, even walking to work would be preferable to his current situation. Anything he can do to distance himself from relying on his father, the better off he will be. 

  • Emotional-Healths NTA. OP, you are sixteen. SIXTEEN. It is not your responsibility to bankroll your 53-year-old father. The fact that he is demanding $50 a week for gas while you work a part time fast-food job is financial ab e. He is essentially charging you a 'success tax' for having a job.
    via u/Emotional-Healths
  • Holidayark8101 Covering gas sometimes is fair, but demanding your paycheck and risking your job isn't.
    via u/Holidayark8101
  • EchoNeko Covering gas is absolutely fair, but unless you live an hour away from work and have a gas-guzzling truck, it shouldn't be costing $200/month
    via u/EchoNeko

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Tags

teenagers bad parenting driving dad mom unemployment fast food money son gasoline
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